Tuesday, July 15, 2008

oh...not again...

i'm afraid i've let myself become the stand-in girl.
i'm not sure exactly how it keeps happening, really.
just a series of small concessions over a string of years i suppose.
there's a fine line between lending a friendly ear, and letting yourself get taken advantage of.
Somehow, i tend to pole vault over that line and land in the next county. i'm not saying i don't have a blast taking the flight, the plunge, the dive into the unknown (mixed metaphors are really just too delicious sometimes) but the reality and repercussions gnaw away at my independence and feelings of self worth. It gets harder and harder to plaster a smile on my face when you realize your time in the sun is waning.
Do i pony up and stand up for myself, possibly ending what could still be a long and enjoyable relationship?
Do i smack myself in the face to snap myself out of self-recriminating thoughts and just live in the moment?
Can I phone a friend?
Poll the audience?

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